The Maniacs of Never Never Land
by The E.L.K.S. Club
Summary: We don't know where this idea originated, but we like it. It's a bunch of comedy dealing with all kinds of cartoons, plus our own little characters. Is not to be taken seriously, but please review anyway. :)
1. The Beginning Or: The Great Search

The Maniacs of Never Never Land  
  
A/N: For this story, I want to say one word: BEWARE! It is something seriously not normal. That's why you're going to love it!!! Read and Review…please.  
  
Disclaimer: We thank J.K.R and Walt Disney…and our psychiatrists.  
  
Once upon a time there were three girls who were never to be apart. One was Sunny Black, another Evie Lupin, and the last Kassidy Pettigrew. These three girls were sworn at all costs to be safe, and near each other at all times, but one day their bodyguard Sleepy fell into a deep sleep. He was always a strange fellow, so when he collapsed beside Sunny, she took no notice. The only thing she did was push him off of her glass slippers, where he had begun to drool. Looking around they decided quickly to leave before anyone saw them. Where though they did not know, until suddenly they heard a voice behind them. It was a mirror, with the head of Bambi in it telling them to go to the city under the sea and find Ariel.   
  
They at once agreed and were off in scuba gear before you could say "Toto, come home". When they were under the sea they met many creatures, like Flounder! At last they came to Ariel's chambers, where they persuaded her to come along with them. When she agreed some sort of curse must have been lifted because all of the sudden the sky cleared from its rain clouds and they could see light. With the light came the shape of a ship that belonged to Captain Hook. The bright sunlight reflected off his silver hook, which had a little dress on it. The ship was their next stop, and they quickly swam to it. The trio and the five other tag-alongs (Flounder, Sebastian, Ariel, King Triton, and Ursula) got onto the ship and introduced themselves to Captain Hook, who was playing a game of chess with Jasmine. He was obviously trying to catch her eye, so Evie took him aside and told him that she and her friends would be happy to help him get her attention.  
  
The task wouldn't be easy though, because others wanted her too. Aladdin, Abu, Iago, and the Flying Carpet were just a few. Mr. Melvin, or Captain Hook, was stronger though and was easily the tallest. So, the trio decided he should wrestle the others to see who got Jasmine's hand in marriage. But, to make it fair, they said the losers would get a night out with one of them and Ariel. The battle raged on, but in the end a winner was chosen, it was Iago and he took Jasmine up to her room with an ecstatic expression on his face. Now he was not the only happy one that evening. Aladdin and the Flying Carpet realized their undying love for each other, Abu and Ariel made their way back to her bedroom chamber, and Captain Hook took Kassidy by the hand and led her away to a night of excitement. King Triton and Flounder knew that they needed someone and King Triton asked Sunny to join him in his quarters and she accepted. Flounder and Evie looked at each other from different sides of the room and knew.   
  
Before anyone could yell "Jiminy Cricket" they had clashed together in an intense and engaging kiss. In the end, Iago and Jasmine had a baby feather boy. Aladdin and Flying Carpet had many good nights in their lives together. Abu and Ariel invented Sea Monkeys. Captain Hook and Kassidy are frequently found in his personal cabin of his ship. Sunny became Queen Sunny and Prince Charming was Triton and her son. Flounder and Evie created many happy merchildren, all of which were Merfaggots. And Ursula well lets just say she's Dumbo's real Mom.  
  
AND THAT'S WHAT REALLY HAPPENED!  
  
A/N: Well what did you think? Wasn't it just wonderful? Just remember now f/r! Be looking forward to the first middle!! 


	2. The First Middle Or: The Birthday Bash

A/N: Shining Moonlight & Silver ~ Ice wrote alternating chapters. This is one of the cooler scary fics we've written together. Some are more odd. This one we wrote off of Pepsi, Vernors, cheese, and the Offspring music. Enjoy! Chow!  
  
Disclaimer: We own the plot. Nothing else. Except Evie, Sunny, Kassidy and that's it. You figure out who everyone else is owned by. Thank you to Disney, Warner Bros., the Offspring, Kenna, Linkin Park, and especially Snoop Dogg!!!  
  
The Maniacs of Never~Never Land  
  
Once upon a time, Kassidy, Evie, and Sunny (the three good fairies) recieved a message from Bambi, telling them to give gifts to Sleeping Beauty. Sunny knew at once that she would give the gift of seduction to Sleeping Beauty, (who's real name was Roxanne) so she wrapped it up in a pink frilly box with a golden bow on top. Evie and Kassidy decided they would give Roxie intelligence from Evie and passiveness from Kassidy. Sunny peeked into Kassidy's cheap purple gift bag and threw a fit.   
  
"There's no such thing as a shy girl who's also sexy! And none of them are smart, Evie, look at me!" She then realized what she had said and blushed. Kassidy reluctantly changed her gift to a nice, shiny beaver.   
  
Evie got a box of tissues from the closet and decided it would do. "After all, when she sees what she's got foar a godmother she'll need the tissues." Evie said indicating to Sunny laughingly. There was a knock at the door and Kassidy pulled it open to reveal Mickey Mouse and Donald Duck, and of course Goofy. They each escorted one of the faries to the yellow PTO Cruiser. There weren't enough seats to fit them and Pluto, so Sunny sat on Goofy's lap. When they got to the apartment building, Donald held out his hand and Evie took it.  
  
"Oh, Donnie! Such a gentleman!" Evie giggled. Kassidy and Mickey rolled their eyes as they knocked on the door. King Louie, visiting from his jungle kingdom, answered the door. Kassidy casually winked at him and he blew her a kiss.  
  
"Roxanne is upstairs, she just got her new Kenna CD and she can't stop listening to their awesome song Hellbent." He said, leading the seven of them (Sunny, Kassidy, Evie, Goofy, Pluto, Donald, and Mickey)to Roxie's quarters. She was humming Hellbent's chorus. There were Offspring, Linkin Park, Kenna, 2pac, and Snoop Dogg posters all over the walls and her curtains ~ not to mention the bedspread ~ were all decorated with these artist's lyrics. Sunny tapped Roxie on the shoulder and they embraced as old friends did. Then, Kassidy, Evie, and Sunny presented Roxie with their gifts. Mickey, Donald, Goofy, Pluto and Louie all gave her new CD's and she christianed the beaver "Oscar". Then they all decided to go to Chip and Dale's house for the Thanksgiving feast. They knew Garfield and Odie had arranged for Snoop Dogg and the Offspring to perform and they weren't going to miss the once~in~a~lifetime performance.  
  
A/N: This fic is a random act of craziness and we LOVE IT!!! F/R please, we've got more comin' your way with Snoop and Offspring, maybe even Linkin Park, Kenna, and some tangerines!!! 


	3. The Second Middle Or: The Thanksgiving F...

The Maniacs of Never Never Land   
  
Chapter 3~ The Second Middle  
  
Disclaimer: We own the Opisa, Kassidy, Evie, and Sunny. We want to thank the Offspring for their phenomenal music, and Snoop Dogg for being Snoop D-O-double G!!!  
  
A/N: This chapter is dedicated to The Hermione Granger Fan Club for making our day by reviewing Silver ~ Ice's story!!!  
  
* Thanksgiving *  
  
Chip and Dale had decorated their house marvelously, putting live turkeys into all of the rooms. In the kitchen a huge table already seated Snow White, Cinderella, the 101 Dalmations, Dumbo, Lady and the Tramp, Winnie the Pooh, Tigger, Eyeore, Piglet, and many others. Everyone took their seats and waited for their food. It appeared suddenly atop the table, but there was no turkey. Instead the plates were decked in orange circles.   
  
"Tangerines for Thanksgiving?" Sunny exclaimed, picking up the fruit.  
  
"Well, I couldn't find it in my heart to kill a turkey," Chip said.  
  
"We decided that clemintines were the best thing we could serve," Dale put in.  
  
"Who cares?" The Tramp barked suddenly.  
  
"Really, let's eat and get ready for some musical entertainment!" Evie cried, unpeiling two tangerines at a time. Everyone sat for a moment, but then started to empty the plates. Within fifteen minutes, the food was gone and everyone was well fed.  
  
"Yo, yo, yo! Happy Thanksgiving! What is up, my brothers?" Snoop Dogg exclaimed from the doorway.  
  
"Snoop, my man! Where ya been?" Roxie said, slapping Snoop's hand in excitment.  
  
"Ya know how it is. Chillin' with homies from the G," Snoop said moving his hands in the air.  
  
"Now, Mr.Dogg, I do believe you've promised a performance," Kassidy said, crossing her arms in front of her.  
  
"Well, what ya'll waiting for?" Snoop yeled, going into the next room. There was a loud clatter of chairs and a mad rush after him. All the guests were in the next room. Inside, five turkeys were flying around and a huge stage was set to the front. Snoop stood atop it with band members.  
  
"Do I have any lovely ladies that are willing to assist me?" Snoop inquired, looking pointedly at Roxie and Sunny. The two dashed onto the stage immediatly.  
  
"Hmm, you come up here too," Snoop said, pointing to Kassidy, who had to be taken to the stage by Evie,(who had to stay behind). Snoop's performance started out well enough, but in mid-verse the door was flung open. Sunny, who had been booty dancing with the drummer, stopped in shock. There stood a troup of monkeys.  
  
"Hello, my name is Opisa, I am the greatest relative to the wondrous King Louie. We have come to this feast, for we have realized that we were not invited, do explain yourselves for this indicency." The Opisa thundered.  
  
"Yo, chill out, grab a seat, get an energy drink from the cooler, join the fun!" Snoop said.  
  
"Really?" the opisa asked in shock.  
  
"Really, really," Snoop said before singing again. When he was done, everyone applauded and the girls left the stage happily.  
  
"Well, brothers and sisters, I'm gonna miss ya'll, but I'll be back next Thanksgiving," Snoop stated, waving good-bye. No sooner had the door closed behind him, when the Offspring appeared on stage.  
  
"Yeah! It's the Offspring! You guys ROCK!" Evie screamed shrilly.  
  
"Of course we do, we have secret rocking chips to make us rock with a difference!" Noodles, the guitarist, said in confidence.  
  
"Now this song is called Come Out Swinging," Dexter, the lead vocalist, said as they began to play just one of their MANY hits. Everyone was going wild, especially the Opisa, who had written * I love the Offspring * across his chest in bright pink letters. The Offspring rocked on through the whole night, making that Thanksgiving on to always remember.  
  
Next up~ Oh nooo, New Years with Uncle Scrooge! 


	4. The Third Middle Or: The New Year's Caba...

The Maniacs of Never Never Land: The Third Middle  
  
By: The E.L.K.S. Club  
  
Disclaimer: We own no one except Evie, Sunny, and Kassidy. Thanks to Disney, Warner Bros., Brian Adams, Savage Garden, Kenna, Linkin Park, THE OFFSPRING, and Snoop D-O-G-G! Also, to the makers of Doritos and Fresca.  
  
A/N: Warning-this is a random act of insanity!! Read on at your own risk!  
  
"Baah Humbug!" Scooby Doo snarled as he read the invitation again. It read:  
  
Dear Mr. Doo,  
  
You are cordially invited to Mr. Roland Scroogemeister (Uncle Scrooge)'s home to celebrate New Year's with many other guests. There will be food, friends, and entertainment by world renound artists Kenna and Linkin Park. Please R.S.V.P. before 2 o'clock today. ~Mr. Scrooge  
  
"Scooby! It's 2:01! Call Scrooge-man NOW!" Velma called.   
  
"Okie-dokie-doo!" Scooby answered. Scrooge said they could still come (although they'd be in the nose-bleed section of the auditorium) so they piled into that blue and green van (Mystery Mobile) and were off.  
  
The door was answered by Kassidy and she led them inside, along with Captain Hook (her ex-lover, remember?). They sat down at the table after a quick game of musical chairs. Dewy and Louie (the duck, not the ape) were chowing down on cashew-flavoured tofu.  
  
"This stuff is the best!" Hewy said, spitting as he talked.  
  
"Ew, you're disgusting!" Alice cried out at Pocahontas's friend the raccoon named Meeko. He was eating cherry garcia ice cream mixed with almond chicken and onion rings. It truly was disgusting, but everyone's attention was turned to the door as Kassidy, Evie, and Sunny strolled in laughing loudly about how Tweety and Sylvester had tailed them all the way to the party.  
  
"And then…they got blown up by that dumb coyote!" Sunny choked out, holding her side. They were followed in by three large muscular men carrying guitars, cymbals, and speakers into Roland (Scrooge, remember?)'s living room. Then, some tousled band members recognized as Kenna walked in wearing matching orange shirts. Kassidy ran up to the lead singer and hugged him. King Louie got up and let out a "hmph! Humans!" and left with a noisemaker clutched in his tail.   
  
"Yes, I see I have been the cause of a tragedy, my sympathies. But now I must perform," the lead singer said to Kassidy. The orane-shirted stars assembled their instruments and Evie flicked the lights. With a snap of Sunny's fingers rainbow lights similar to those in "Hellbent"'s music video swirled across the ceiling. They started to sing and as they did the smurfs came onto the stage dressed like the creatures in the video. They acted out the scenes, making the performance perfect. As the song ended the smurfs jumped off the stage, landing on a table that seated Bert, Ernie, Kermit, and Miss Piggy.  
  
"Wazzzzup?" Kermit said as he danced with the princess smurf. Kenna performed several of their songs before they had to go to tea with Buckbeak, Karkaroff, You-Know-What, and Voldie. The music didn't stop for long, though because Linkin Park quickly stole the stage.  
  
"Hello there," the group said, all staring at Sunny and Roxie. They smiled seductively and knew they had made their hook-up. The melody of the song "One Step Closer" came on and Linkin Park began to jam wildly.  
  
"Woo-hoo, I love this song!" Scrappy said, jumping on a table. They sang many more songs and finally the last one of the evening came on. The sound of a draining sink sounded in the air and they sang their hearts out.  
  
"Well everyone, I hope you had a great time and now, with only two minutes left 'til midnight, get together with your sweetheart and make it a year to remember!" the lead singer said, walking to Sunny. Soon, Roxie was paired with another member from the band as well. Kassidy, though, stood by the vocalist from Kenna smiling. A big green ball appeared from nowhere and Sunny and the Linkin Park dude started screaming,   
  
"27…26…25…" and Evie rushed in, Dexter from The Offspring (the best band ever, remember??) by her side.   
  
"3…2…1…" they screamed. "2001!!!" everyone shouted.  
  
"We have one last performance for you tonight!" Snoop Dogg, who had appeared out of nowhere screamed. "Here we go!" Then, The Offspring, Kenna, Linkin Park, and Snoop Dogg himself jumped onto the stage.   
  
"Did I ever tell you you're my hero? You're everything I wish I could be? I can fly higher than an eagle, cos you are the wind beneath my wings." The Linkin Park people sang while Sunny and Roxanne swooned.  
  
"I knew I loved you before I met you, I think I dreamed you into life, I knew I loved you before I met you, I have been waiting all my life." The Offspring sang in harmony while Evie slipped a ring onto her finger, whispering "Yes! Yes!"  
  
All at once, Kenna started singing, "Look into my eyes, and you will see, what you mean to me. Cos everything I do, oh yeah, I do it for you." Kassidy began tears of joy. Then, when everyone started clapping, Snoop jumped onto the stage.  
  
"Not quite, brothas! Break it down, now! I remember Mama says, 'you can't hurry love, no you just have to wait' she said 'trust in time, no matter how long it takes'" Everyone burst into thunderous applause.   
  
"Bravo! Encore! Encore!" Alice screamed, holding up an 'I LOVE SNOOP' poster. They had found each other at last, and all was right.  
  
end  
  
A/N: We finally had some Harry Potter in there! * bow * Thank you, thank you. Beware, the fourth middle is coming! 


End file.
